Friday, 5 September 2014

Just a Mum...

I seem to have had a lot of these conversations recently... you know, the one where you're asked "What do you do?" and you answer, slightly embarrassedly, that you're "just a Mum" and feel the need to explain all that you did in your career before these little people turned your life upside down and changed you forever.

Earlier this week I got a letter asking me to update my information, and my heart dropped to my stomach when I realised that the box I had to tick, the only one that fit where I'm at at the moment, was "unemployed." "I'm not unemployed" I wanted to shout... "unemployed means you want a job and can't get one. This is my choice!" (FYI - I know that its not that simple, but that was my knee-jerk reaction!)

And really, this isn't going to be another one of those blog posts telling Mums everywhere that they shouldn't use the "just" word, because they are SO much more than "just" a Mum...

Because the thing is, being "just" a Mum is exactly what I'm honoured to be. Being "just" a Mum is exactly what I've chosen to be.

I get to be just a Mum. I don't have to divide my time, my energy or my skills. I have had the amazing privilege of being able to invest myself completely in these little people for the last eighteen months.

So I'm not going to moan about being "just" a Mum - I'm going to do the opposite.

I have many, many friends who would love to be "just" a Mum. But for various reasons, the option to be at home is not open to them...

I have many friends who would love to be the one to tuck their little one down for every nap
Who would love to be the one to witness their babies first steps
Who would love to be the one to pick up that rosy cheeked, bleary eyed, snuggler from their cot after nap time every day.
Who would love to see the joy on their little one's face as they hand over a biscuit
Who would love to paint, and bake, and craft, and draw silly pictures on the patio in chalk.
Who would love to skip, and play snap a hundred times, and send their child to the stairs for the umpteenth time.
Who would love to see that impish giggle at the child who opens their mouth while eating just to provoke you.
Who would love to just be there, doing the everyday, mundane housework while their children play outside, just so they get to be the first person to hear what that little person has just done...
"Mama, come and see this snail!"
"Mama, I just drew a lion!"
"Mama, me and Heidi built a tent!"

You see, in five days time, Ava starts nursery school. She will be in school five mornings a week. And I won't get to see all those things any more.

So right now, I'm feeling incredibly thankful that for most of the first three years of my little girl's life, I got to be "just" a Mum.

I wouldn't change it for the world.


  1. Lovely post Claire and thankful you should be. What a lovely mum you are to those girls - they will grow up knowing they were so bless with this precious time at home with you being "just" a mum x x

  2. I'm loving every minute - couldn't bear to go back to work in case I miss something

  3. Thanks for the reminder that being justa mum is a good and worthy choice. I have certainly struggled since finished work last year. Mich x

  4. Ha ha Claire I had exactly the same heart dropping moment when we went to the Registry Office to register Juliet's birth & they asked me for my occupation. Evie's birth certificate says "Mother - Solicitor" & Juliet's says "Mother - Housewife" (apparently Stay at Home Mum is not a valid occupation...) It took me a while to get my head around that but I know which I'd rather be while my kids are young.

  5. Mor og dotter kosar seg. Eg er enig at det er viktig å vera mor og kjære Claire du er kjempeflink med barna.

  6. I do not regret the 16 years I have been lucky enough to have being just a Mum! I have to thank my wonderful husband for providing that opportunity. It has not been easy at times we missed out on opportunities and trips and so did J . Enjoy the time xx

  7. When I quit my job someone said to me 'oh so your unemployed now!'
    I was shocked, slightly insulted! my response 'no I'm a fully time mother for my two sons and full time carer for partner who is in wheelchair with MS!'
    Hope Ava gets on well at nursery/pre school. Oh and I hope you are ok! Lol another milestone for mum and child. Enjoy. X

  8. I made the same decision and don't regret it for a minute. I've been there for everything, you only ever get this opportunity once. Olivia started reception today and I didn't feel sad, because I know I have a very confident, well mannered, keen and emotionally stable little girl. I can hand on heart say we've enjoyed and made the most of every minute. It's so worth it x

  9. What a lovely post Claire and I agree I do this too, even though I work part time I still say I am 'just a Mum'. But I wouldn't have it any other way. My career was and still is important, but being a Mummy to these two little people is by far the most rewarding job I have ever had. x


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