Quiet Days and Questions...

After a jam-packed December, a fun-filled Christmas and an exciting start to January with the arrival of the girls very first cousin, we have been enjoying a few quiet days just pootling along at home. School runs, nap times and meals are the staple of our every day... the other hours filled with puzzles and playdough, housework and Huette fun, stories and songs, cleaning and colouring, garden games and Grandpa fun.

There are all the normal marks of a household with small children - wild moments of tearing from one end of the room to the other, tearful moments after a crash or collision, giggly moments, and little sister secrets. Increasingly I am realising I am less and less a part of this little double act. They have their own little friendship now - their own games, their own bedtime conversations, their own hiding places and private jokes. And every little piece of me warms up at this realisation. I love their little friendship and I'm so thankful they really are the best of friends. I'm savouring it all up right now... I know they'll probably hit phases where they fight and bicker like nobodies business, so right now I'm just soaking up the fact that they really do adore each other.

Sometimes I worry and wonder how this little third person I'm carrying will affect the dynamic between my two big girls. The balance seems just right, right now, and I can't imagine how this third one will fit in and work its own little place without upsetting the balance.

But then I remember all the questions I had before Heidi was born... how would I ever love another child as much as Ava? Would Ava suffer for having a sibling so young? And I remember that all those silly questions disappeared the moment I drank in that gorgeous downy-haired, chubby newborn and how she wrapped my heart right up in her from day one. Now I look at the two of them together and wonder how I could ever have thought that a sibling would somehow disadvantage Ava... Heidi makes all our lives so full... and those two have been so blessed by each other. They are shaping each other and enhancing every experience they have together. They truly are little buddies.

And so I wait and wonder, knowing deep down that this little one will capture our hearts in just the same way, and work its own little place in our family... and I know, judging by the way these two little ladies love their "babies", there will be no shortage of love and adoration for this little one either...