Letters to my girls: Dear Ava...

Dear Ava,

I don't even know what to say in this letter... you are so very brave and strong and resilient and I am SO very proud of you. You have coped amazingly with being away from Mama and Papa and Heidi for so long, and have shown such strength of character... I know its been hard. Its been hard that Mama's not been there to get you up in the morning and eat breakfast with you, its been hard that Papa's not been there to sing with you and put you to bed at night. Its been hard when you've come into hospital to visit us, and then had to leave again. Its been hard for us too. We love our Ava M time.

And yet we can see so clearly how God has been preparing us as a little family for this time. Remember when Schwesterchen Heidi was born? Remember how Mama had to stay in hospital and couldn't see you for a whole week? That was so hard. But now we can see that God was preparing us for this time apart, so that you would understand that Mama would come home again; so that you could get used to lots of time with Nanny and Grandpa and Tante and Agga... that you would feel safe and secure and cherished, even if Mama wasn't always around...

Its been lovely to see your sensitive nature too. Always caring for Heidi. Always watching out for your little sister. Always telling her "Es ist OK, Heidi - nicht weinen" You are so caring and protective. I know you will always look out for your baby sister.

I have loved our phone conversations this past week in particular. Its no longer me talking at you, but you are now able to hold a conversation. You are telling me what you are doing, what you are eating, who you are playing with. I love hearing the little details of your world.

I miss you so much. I miss the giggles we have; I miss our cuddles; I miss our "Kleiner Schatz" bedtime song. I miss arguing with you about how many stories you want to read; I miss telling you off for turning the gages on the washing machine again; I miss your smell and your slobbery, open-mouthed kisses. I miss you.

Your strength, your sensitivity, your resilience. They are wonderful characteristics to have. They will set you up well for life. Our prayer is that God will use those characteristics, those gifts that you are already displaying, these knocks in your early life, for his glory, and for your good.

Keep strong, our little Ava... we hope to come home to you soon.

Wir haben dich so WAHNSINNIG lieb, unser Schatz...

Mama und Papa

xxx