One Week Old...

Wow! Last Tuesday feels like a lifetime ago as we rocked up to hospital knowing that finally finally after 42 weeks of waiting, we were going to meet our new arrival...

By that evening, we were holding our beautiful BIG (9lb 4oz) baby boy in our arms, and that same familiar feeling of utter devotion and love for this little person overwhelmed me. How could I ever have doubted I would have room in my heart for one more...?

The labour was not easy... I'd go as far as to say it was pretty scary... And resulted, after some distressing signals from our little man, in an emergency C-Section that felt much more "emergency" than our C -section with Heidi. I lost a serious amount of blood, to the point that I called Dave back in the middle of the night as they were prepping me to go back into theatre, when suddenly my body kicked into gear and a timely emergency on the ward drew everyone away and gave my body an hour to show it was turning around. It was pretty scary and hugely humbling. I have never felt so physically weak in my life...

And yet through it all, the age-old testimony of a faithful God who brings peace in the most trying circumstances remains the same.

It's humbling to have to allow other people to do what you usually so capably do for yourself. It's humbling when standing up for 20 seconds causes you to collapse into your husbands arms and come round a few seconds later. It's humbling to hyperventilate in a ward full of people with everyone watching as you lose complete control of your ability to do something as simple as breathe.

It's humbling because I pride myself on being an independent, in control, capable-of-anything sort of girl, and this last week has shown me I am not!

But as always, I see again, that its exactly in these times of weakness that you see most clearly what you are not... 

And most beautifully, what you are...

We are SO blessed.

We have been blessed with a beautiful baby boy, and bringing him life has taken it out of me in a way that has gone beyond what I could've imagined...

But in my weakness, in my suffering, in my humiliation, he was brought life and strength.

Isn't that an amazing picture of what Jesus does for us? His suffering, his humiliation, his weakness on the cross was what brought us life, and strength and a future!

And so this gorgeous little person has taught me so much even in seven days... And we are utterly besotted with him. As my body slowly recovers, his goes from strength to strength. He is drinking in life (quite literally - talk about loving his milk!!), he is loving the cuddles and he is making us all fall head over heels for him with his cute little face, contented little character and that adorable new baby smell.

Jonas - I thank God for you my darling boy...

Happy one week birthday. Xxx

                       

And a few from Instagram...