Thursday 5 July 2012

Back to work...

Yesterday was a momentous occasion. I left my little girl for the longest time so far (during the day), and headed into work. I was away from her for 5 hours...

My maternity leave is over.

I am so grateful to God that I have had the opportunity to have 11 months of being at home full time with this little one. It has been such a privilege to be able to spend time with her, get to know her little personality, invest in her and enjoy her company. I am grateful that even now, going back, I am able to go back part time, so that I can see her take her first steps and say her first word. I am so grateful, because I know that so many people would love to have that opportunity. I am so grateful for a boss, and staff at my school, who have been so understanding, and have made it possible for me to go back 1 and a half days, and not laughed at me for it, or told me that's ridiculous, or said it's impossible. I am so grateful that my Mum is round the corner and is not only willing, but so excited, at the prospect of looking after her little granddaughter every week... I'm grateful because there's no-one I trust more with our little girl, and I'm grateful because it means I don't need to go back full time to pay for child care.

I am so blessed in so many ways, and I know that so often, I take so much of it for granted. So I just wanted to stop and say Thank You to the one who gave us Ava, who is faithful, and loving and always there. On Sunday, we will dedicate ourselves to bringing up Ava to know about Jesus (more on that next week) and I am just blown away, sometimes, by just how good God is.

So when I feel like crying, this morning, at the thought of leaving Ava for a whole day... of saying goodbye at 7.45am and only seeing her again around 5pm for a couple of hours before she goes to bed... when I have a little wobble at school at the thought of all she is doing and all I am missing... when I stop at the end of the day and have a pile of books to mark before I go running back to her... when all that happens, I must remember only one thing...

I must remember how truly blessed I am.

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