Monday 6 January 2014

It's official - a career change...

If you had asked me as a child what I wanted to do when I grew up, I'd have been able to answer in a flash... "I want to be a part-time teacher, a part-time author and a part-time actress."

Over the years, I've dabbled in a bit of theatre production, I've been blogging here 7 years now, which I suppose is the closest thing to writing I've ever done, but as time went on, my eyes turned increasingly to teaching.

In 2008 I trained to become a primary teacher and never looked back.

I loved it.

Yes, there were times I wished there wasn't so much paperwork, yes there were times I felt I was drowning under a pile of 30 literacy books and 30 numeracy books and 30 topic books, yes, there were times my year 6 classes drove me round the bend, yes, there were times when the sheer volume of planning meant I had no weekend at all.

But I adored it; the buzz of the classroom, seeing the penny drop, watching children come out of their shell, seeing them getting excited about their learning, finding little cards and notes they had written me on my desk. I felt like I was right where I belonged.
During Teacher Training with a Year 1 class - they are now Year 6!
And then I had children, and suddenly the classroom couldn't be my world anymore. When I returned to work, I felt torn... Torn because I loved my job so very much, but I loved my children even more, and somehow I just couldn't give what I wanted to give to the classroom any more. I couldn't walk into my classroom at 7am and leave at 6pm; I couldn't get home, throw together a quick dinner and then get on with planning and marking. I couldn't do that, because I didn't want to. I wanted to be with the girls.


I couldn't do teaching without giving it everything, I didn't know how to... And yet, I also couldn't give it everything anymore because it wasn't my everything any more.

My "career" had changed the moment I breathed in that newborn smell when Ava was laid across me, seconds after she was born.

And so, on the Friday before Christmas, I did what I knew I needed, and wanted, to do.

I handed in my notice.

It was hard. I welled up as I did it, because I loved it. But right now, for this season, I know that with my little girls is where I want to be. It is the right thing for our family, and I know I'm privileged to be able to step out of work. I know that.

And so its the start of a new chapter for us as a little family. I am officially a Stay-at-Home Mum and that's such an honour. I'm thankful to be able to experience every minute with these two bundles of joy.

One day, I'd love to return to teaching; there is nothing else I can imagine I'd rather do... but for now, I'll be here; wiping noses, changing nappies and reading picture books.

Right where I want to be.

15 comments:

  1. Well done for taking such a brave decision, Clare. I can't imagine it was easy, but also it must have been perfectly clear what you needed and wanted to do. Congratulations on your new career!

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  2. May you be blessed in this God honouring choice and may many others follow your example.

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  3. I have a lump in my throat from reading that, but I can say that I never regretted doing the same; midwifery v sons! I haven't been able to go back to that job later, because of my health, but God knows what's best for me & has blessed me/us so much. I pray he will bless you too xox

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  4. A big decision but time out with family is precious you can return to work but you can't recapture that family time. #MagicMoments

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  5. Best decision you ever made hun. I gave up full time teaching after the birth of my second and I now work on a supply basis - it's great because I get to do all bits of teaching I love with none of the politics, paper work, pressure etc. I get to go to assemblies and take my son to school, spend time with my girls - I have a work life balance
    You won't look back x
    #MagicMoments

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  6. Wow Claire that's such a huge step but perfect. I was so lucky when Laura was born that I was able to stay home until she was in Reception when I started clerking at GAPNS. Those years were so precious and we have such a close relationship which I am sure is a direct result of giving her so much time. Your girls are very lucky! You'll be missed at school but it's important to live life for yourself and your family!! Lots of luck xxx

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  7. Well done for making such a big decision and acting on it! Your daughters look gorgeous. They grow up so quickly don't they! Good luck being a stay at home mum! #magicmoments

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  8. Oh honey! I had goosebumps reading this because I made exactly the same decision from exactly the same job after I had my girl 4 years ago. And without a doubt this is harder. But I agree you can't do both with the gusto and enthusiasm they require, because its physically impossible time wise. That time will come for you to step back into the classroom, and you'll be able to look back at all those precious moments with your beautiful girls knowing this was the right thing. I miss it, I still get that pang now especially when my teacher friends ask me for classroom advice. But I know this is where I am meant to be right now. They're only tiny for such a short time, I wouldn't change my position in life for the world now. Enjoy every moment and well done you. Lots of love xxxxxx

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  9. You won't regret it. One day I plan to go back to teaching but my boys are more important now xx

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  10. Beautifully written...and a very wise decision. I feel exactly the same, I miss teaching so much, but know that I cannot give it my all. I'm still not sure, after 6 years, if I will go back. X

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  11. awww honey, i welled up reading this, i was exactly the same with when i took voluntary redundancy i loved my job with all my heart but i wanted to be with my children more.

    Big hugs my lovely

    Thank you for sharing and linking up with #MagicMoments

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  12. I was not really given a choice because of ill health when Jon was born and medical intervention soon after. After 16 years and I have been lucky I have a husband who despite the financial pressure has allowed me to spend time with Jon and believed a mothers role was the most important job I could have. If my health had not been a problem I would still have chosen this role above all others! Enjoy the time you have as they soon grow up.

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  13. That must have been a very hard decision, and I know how it feels because I gave up my job to stay home with my son. I'm sure your girls will appreciate all the wonderful moments you'll have together! #MagicMoments

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  14. I don't think I realised you are a teacher Claire, how dim! How amazing through to be able to stay home and nurture your babes. I become a SAHM in July after being a working Mum for near 10 years and this is definitely were God wants me to be. Enjoy this special time, Mich x

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  15. This had me welling up! I think that teaching is such a wonderfully vocational job. If you feel that passionate, you will return to it. And people like you should be teachers, that's what you were made for. For now you're teaching your 2 girls but soon enough you will be back in that class room. The children will wait! x

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