How sweet to hold a newborn baby
And feel the pride and joy he gives
But greater still: the calm assurance
This child can face uncertain days because He lives
Because He lives, I can face tomorrow
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living just because He lives
I've always loved the chorus of this song, but I've always thought the verse to be a bit random... why are they writing about newborn babies? And yet this Sunday I sang it like I've never sung it before, with my heart in my mouth and a lump in my throat. I was singing it for our Heidi.
Today we are going back to the Brompton. I have felt every emotion - fear, hope, anxiety and I'm now at the stage of denial... pushing it out of my head until we get there this afternoon. Then the tears will flow, regardless of the outcome. We have ridden the last 5 weeks on the joyful outcome of the last appointment; hope. Her arteries were decreasing, her CRP levels right down, her mood happy. We have delighted in and savoured every moment of that wonderful news, and yet now we approach another appointment, and the fear of a different outcome kicks in.
And that's why, this Sunday, this song meant so much to me. This child, our Heidi, our (not so) newborn baby, can face uncertain days. Why? Because He lives, He reigns, He holds her in His capable hands. And so as I sang, I was preaching to myself... I can face tomorrow, my fear is gone, he holds her future and all because He lives.
Please would you join us in praying for our baby girl today... Our appointment is at 2.30pm.
Thank you Jesus that you bring hope and peace when our hearts feel heavy with sighs...