Me and Mine: March 2015

Mealtime.

The staple part of any family's day. We are old traditionals when it comes to food. Dinner is round the table without the television. An opportunity for us to talk, share about our day, enjoy each others company (for the most part)...

Our mealtimes start with Heidi. She is our table-layer and chief food lover, so she is always the first to the table. Some days she sits happily and waits, chatting as I finish getting the dinner ready, or playing with her fork and spoon. She repeats the same old stories. Like the time Nanny flushed her pants down the toilet and said "Goodness Me!" (Yes! That did happen this week!), or the time Ava bumped into her. Other days she is a little more demanding.

It's hard waiting for your dinner when you're two.

And then dinner is ready, and Papa will arrive home, and there will be a flurry of activity as food is served, aprons are donned and drinks are poured.

And then the meal will begin. Every meal begins with the ritual announcement from Ava; "OH! This is my favourite dinner!!" regardless of what it is. There will be a time to thank God for his provision for us again. And then we tuck in!

There may be things to fill Papa in on as he's literally just through the door from work.

There may be school tales from Ava.

There may be potty training clapping and cheering for Heidi.

There may be giggles for no reason between the girls.

There may be battles about pudding without dinner, or wanting to stand up in your high chair, or play with your food.

There may be jokes from three-year-old humour, like how funny it is to stick your drink up your nose.

There may be just sitting quietly and listening and enjoying your dinner.

 Each mealtime is different. Some are a joy and a pleasure. Some are a battle and hard work. Whichever way it goes, I realise mealtimes are a training ground for the girls. They are learning to be grateful for what they have, they are learning how to listen, they are learning how to communicate, they are learning to share with the people they love, they are learning manners and self-discipline.

Most of all, they are learning what it means to be a family.

Our little family. Me and mine in March...

 

On the Lost Art of Independent Play...

It's a happy little routine we've fallen in to. It's evolved and changed beyond recognition since the early routines of my firstborn, but right now, I'm perfectly contented with our little schedule. Typically, I know it will all be thrown to the wind with a new arrival in June, so right now, I'm savouring every moment of the "calm before the storm"...

The girls were always post-lunch nappers, and from their very earliest days, getting them into a good napping routine was high on my priority list. It meant happy babies. It meant sane Mama. It meant a lot of sacrifices too. I didn't, and still don't, go out for lunch much, and between 12 and 3 is pretty much a write-off for any social activity, unless people want to come to me.

But boy has it been worth it. Our littlest lady heads up to bed around 1pm, and doesn't reappear, often, until around 3.30pm, and my big girl... well, with the help of a gro-clock, she has been learning the art of keeping herself entertained for an hour every day in her bedroom.

I think kids amusing themselves is becoming a bit of a lost art. They are growing up in a world surrounded by high energy, visuals and over-stimulation. Ipads, mobile phones, TV screens and laptops are part of their everyday. I didn't know what a single one of those things was until I was at least ten (excepting the TV!) Children get "bored" way quicker I think, and need constant play dates, activity and entertainment... don't get me wrong. Our girls are well acquainted with all the above, and I think they have their place, but I sometimes wonder if our children are growing up in a world that is over-screen-saturated.

Which is why we've worked hard to teach our girls to play alone. It sounds anti-social, and it sounds dated, but I remain utterly convinced by it. It gives them much needed daily quiet and respite, it teaches them to appreciate silence, it encourages their independence and their imaginations.

And its not an entirely selfless act, I'll admit... an hour of total space every lunchtime is a lifeline for a Mama of preschoolers. I genuinely mean it when I say I don't know how people do the constancy and intensity of it otherwise... its often the first (and only!) full cup of tea I'll drink in a day. A chance to think, space to breath, and an opportunity to have uninterrupted peace too.


And when my big girl comes down after an hour, we have another hour while baby sister sleeps on for Mama and Ava time. After an hour of space, I'm energised, enthusiastic and much more able to spend the hour doing something productive with her. Its our together time. I try to make sure I'm not distracted or doing other jobs around the house (that's what my mornings are for!) That one hour, I am hers - to draw with her, play her games, prepare activities, chat, bake... every day a little bit different. But I'm savouring it all up because I know this golden hour will disappear in September when she heads off to school.

And then, I'm hoping, praying that the cycle will continue as baby sleeps (!!), and Heidi learns the lost art of independent play, followed by Mama time, too...

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Me and Mine: January

The photo is grainy, the light bad, the angle off centre... and yet this photo captures January for us. A month of snuggling up indoors with the heating on and a good book...

Outside we have had every type of weather under the sun thrown at us (although the promised snow remains elusive! No fear... we are off back to Norway next week and will soon put that to rights!) and the girls have enjoyed trudging up and down the garden in icey winter sunshine, beavering away in their Huette while the rain pours, and braving gusty winds. We have not let it stop us getting outside, but somehow, in the evening, all you want to do is cuddle up together as darkness closes in.

Our bedtime routine remains the same all year round, and yet there is something extra special about it in these wintry months. The girls are keen to clamber into warm beds, snuggle up for their bedtime bible story, gulping down warm milk before they say their prayers. There is something of the desire to hibernate in them. And rousing Ava from her slumber in the morning for Nursery school has been no small feat.

And so this picture, with all its technical faults and flaws, captures a very real everyday moment for us. All gathered together on Ava's bed, reading a couple of stories, praying together and enjoying those last minute bedtime cuddles before lights go out and glow in the dark stars shine bright in chubby little hands. Those precious moments before Mama's lullabies are silenced and little voices call out their last good nights.

A very ordinary, yet very precious, Me and Mine in January.

Night night: Sisters in June

We have had a lovely start to June. Despite the rather desperate weather at the beginning, we are now enjoying days in the sunshine, soaking up the heat and spending hours in the garden, pottering about the house, reading countless storybooks and, of course, getting up to mischief (Yes, I'm not going to forget last Thursday in a hurry!!)

And yet whatever each day holds, they all end the same for us. Two little girls, tucked up in Mama and Papa's bed with a beaker of warm milk, ready for a storybook, a Bible story and prayers. Children love routine, and our girls are no exception. However manic and mad the run-up to bedtime may be (and trust me... often it IS manic and mad...) somehow this little routine; cosying up together and quietening down for stories, brings peace to the mayhem.

Heidi is beginning to quieten down now and, rather than the previous habit of crawling all over the bed while Ava tried to hear the story, is now beginning to sit quietly beside her sister. She's still got a little way to go, but she's getting there, and loves it as long as the stories aren't too long (books are still just pages to be turned, rather than stories to be enjoyed - anyone else get that?!)

Ava's prayers currently consist of a "Thank you for..." followed by a long list of every family member, every friend she can think of followed by her dolls and cuddly toys. Dave and I often have a silent chuckle while she prays again, thanking God for her muslin... these are the special little moments I don't want to forget. I'm treasuring them all up. Storing them away. These golden June days with these little sisters.

So here we are: Siblings in June.

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How to Spring Clean your house in manageable steps: 40 Bags... Savouring the Season Linky Party 25

It's that time again... the buds begin to show on the branches, the sunshine starts to creep through, the rain (finally!) begins to wane and the dreaded "Spring Clean" commences...

I've gone through a few phases on this one...

Phase One: Spring Clean? What's that?
Phase Two: Big plans = total overwhelming failure
Phase Three: 40 bags in 40 days...

The last one is an idea I would truly love to claim as the ingenious idea of my own brain, but sadly I can't. It is, in-fact, the brain-child of the lovely Sarah at Clover Lane (which after 3 years of blog-reading remains to this day my absolute favourite, number-one blog to read) who is a self-confessed obsessor over cleanliness and lack of clutter. I am not one of these. I mean, I like cleanliness, and I like order, but I am prone to leaving the odd (understatement) "pile" of "stuff" on the stairs for someone to trip over, or on the side of the piano, or... you get the picture.

ANYway... a few years ago, I came upon this little project that Sarah does every year to spring clean her entire house top to bottom and I have totally fallen in love with it. It's been my Spring project the last couple of years, and its the only thing that's worked.

It is genius... and works right alongside the Lenten period (which I know started last week... OK, I'm a little behind schedule this year!)

So are you convinced?? Why not join in the fun this year...

40 BAGS IN 40 DAYS

Step One: Make a List. Number 1-40 down the side of your page and by each number write down an area you want to declutter. The KEY is to keep the areas small and manageable... e.g. Day One: Bathroom cabinet, Day Two: Medicine Cabinet etc etc

Step Two: Gather your equipment. I have a little bucket that I keep everything in... disinfectant spray, a cloth, baby wipes, and a bin bag (preferably black). You're all set to go.

Step Three: Each day, I take a little bit of time to tackle that day's area. Some days it literally takes me 5 minutes, other jobs are bigger, so I leave them to days I know I'm going to be around. Some days I might be on a roll and cover a couple of days at once (always a bonus as then I get a day off!) Whatever you do, the key is to set aside ten minutes a day to tackle your area.

Step Four: Be lethal. Empty out said area and chuck anything that hasn't been touched since the year before; half used conditioners, jeans with so many holes they're now officially indecent, toys the girls have forgotten about (hence the black bin bag... prevents a sudden rekindled interest in that toy!) Chuck what needs chucked and take whatever you can to the charity shop.

Step Five: Once everything's emptied out, give a quick spray of disinfectant and clean the drawer/shelf/box/cupboard in question before packing the "to-stay" items back in again.

It is quick, easy and effective... and by Easter you know you have a house that has literally been cleaned top to bottom. It is such a good feeling!

Of course, its also a time to reflect. To recognise the absolute abundance of "stuff" that we have accumulated, and remember, and practically give, to those less fortunate than ourselves.

So, who's with me??!

Link up your springtime posts below! Spring-cleaning, Spring adventures... anything and everything which is #SavouringtheSeason and please, please, PLEASE do go round and comment on each others. Even if its just the couple before your link!

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SO glad spring is finally here!!!

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Click the link below... its really easy!

Thanks :)

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Out with the old, in with the new!

I am increasingly learning that life is all about seasons...

The other week a friend mentioned to me a post I had written a while back about my cleaning schedule. I am a massive fan of routines and to-do lists, and Ava, who was 6 months old when I wrote this post, was at the age where babies are happy to sit and play while Mama whizzes around with hoover, duster and baby wipes (the most multi-functional item ever invented!) in hand.

Oh, boy; those days are long gone!

I want our home to be clean and tidy and organised; but I also want it to be manageable. And with a two-year-old and a 7-month-old in the picture, I've pretty much waved goodbye to my old way of doing things. I DO think that as the one at home, there is a responsibility on me to do the bulk of the housework. Its only fair when you have a husband working all day (although I must admit he is fab and does far more than I think he should do!) but I also have found that spreading the work out over the week doesn't work for me anymore.

Our family grew last March, and with two children, life became a bit more manic - I struggled to remember what I was "supposed" to be doing, what needed doing, or when things had last been done, and to be honest, my response to feeling a little bit overwhelmed by it all was to let it go a bit...

Cue disaster zone.

Add in a month's stay in hospital and a summer away from home, and you can imagine what it was like. If it hadn't been for Dave, the house would most probably have resembled a bomb site.

It was frustrating and I felt like I wasn't really achieving anything, and I felt I wasn't fulfilling the role I was meant to. And so I ended up being grumpy, and feeling guilty, and then feeling guilty about being grumpy...

And so evolved my cleaning day.

Hello Blitz-the-house Monday!

On Mondays, I put Heidi down for a nap at 9am (as usual), and then its all systems go... I strip down the beds, stick a wash on, clean the bathroom while Heidi's settling and then I dust and hoover upstairs while Heidi's in her initial deep sleep. That way the hoover doesn't disturb her. After that, Ava and I head downstairs and I have a good hour left of Heidi's nap to get the rest done. Whatever doesn't happen on a Monday, doesn't happen. I found that hard at first, but I'm learning that I need to be realistic, and actually, in a weird way, knowing its my one opportunity keeps me motivated and makes me get on with it. I can't put it off til "tomorrow".

The thing is, I'm holding it all loosely, because I've no doubt it will all change again when our circumstances change. Right now, it works for us, and the extra incentive of a cup of tea at 11am (or lunch if we're running a bit behind with getting everything done in time!) with my lovely friend Anna post cleaning morning helps me have a target to work to too!

I don't have this sussed. The down side is, I no longer really get to do the "deep clean" stuff - you know, the proper clearing out drawers and cupboards, cleaning out the oven, descaling things etc etc, but you know what? That's OK for now. I just need to find other opportunities to do those things and they aren't going to get done as regularly as they used to. Keeping our home clean and safe, with clean clothes and food on the table is the main thing. And ultimately, my priority is not having a show-home house that could be part of the Ideal Home Show. Its providing a home for our family.

So today, while you're reading this, I'm probably flying round the house with a duster in hand while Ava creates chaos behind me!

What do you do to keep on top of your cleaning? Do you have a system? Have you found there are "seasons" in life where you have to let some things go? How do you stop becoming too "house-proud"? I'd love to know your thoughts!

The tale of three girls...

There was once a tale of three girls...

One of them didn't want to sleep - at nap time she sat in her bedroom and climbed onto the window sill to watch the world go by, she read and sang and played and cried wolf a thousand times that she needed the toilet (which she didn't)... and made her Mama tired with all the running up and down the stairs. She was the-girl-who-didn't-want-to-sleep.

The second little girl loved her sleep. She would sleep all day if she could. Anywhere was fine. Just as long as she got a little shut-eye at any opportunity. Of course, pink bunny generally had to be to hand. She slept through all the noise that the-girl-who-didn't-want-to-sleep made most of the time. Her Mama was thankful for that. But sometimes she would get woken. And then she would be grumpy. And fall asleep in other random places. Like her Jumperoo. That was the-girl-who-loved-her-sleep.

The third girl wished she could sleep. She had so much to do she went to bed very late, and the-girl-who-didn't-want-to-sleep didn't let her get any rest during the day, so she kept on her cycle of going to bed late and getting up early and getting no rest in the middle. That was the-girl-who-wished-she-could-sleep.

And so they ended up three grumpy girls. Oh dear.

The moral of the story?

Get good sleep.

I think Heidi's got it sussed. I'm making it official. Bed time this week: 10.30pm. If I put it on here, I've got to stick to it... right?!

PS - apologies for the very bad quality of photos... they were taken by a rather tired me on my phone!

Night night, sleep tight...

Yesterday we set up Heidi's little cot in the girls room... My baby girl is outgrowing her Moses basket! How quickly these 4 months have gone!

Bedtime has always been a military style operation in our house... Milk, bedtime story, teeth brushed, songs then sleep. 7pm we disappear up the stairs with the girls and they don't reappear until the morning (we hope!) Having this set routine has helped our girls to know what to expect... Of course, Ava sometimes complains about going to bed, but she's never put up a fight. She knows its a losing battle. As for us, having the routine has meant we know the girls will be settled and quiet by 8pm and we have the evening to get work done, or just relax. It's been a lifesaver when you have two lively little girls hanging off you all day!

Both in cots... my babies are growing up *sob*

On Monday, this article was published by the BBC. It makes for fascinating reading... its to be expected, I suppose. The link between poorer mental performance and lax bed times has long been suspected, and it seems that they have now found the evidence to be conclusive. Tired children do not make good learners; children with no routine do not make good learners. Its a truth I've experienced both in- and outside of the classroom.

Start Quote

Establishing a good bedtime routine early in childhood is probably best, but it's never too late”

Study author Prof Sacker

So you see, getting these Bubbas into a good routine really is all perks... yes, its hard work at the beginning... yes, training your baby to go off to sleep independently, insisting they go to bed on your terms and not theirs, putting them to bed at the same time every night, even if it means you have to sacrifice your plans - all of these things are temporarily tiring and testing and difficult, but boy, are they worth it. On every level, routine is worth it. I'm convinced.

What do you think? Is establishing a routine early the way forward? Is there room to be flexible? Have you found something else to work? I'm intrigued to know - please share your thoughts in the comments!